Beyond traveling: Collecting beautiful moments of pleasure

When I launched this blog a few months ago, I mentioned some of the things/activities I enjoy and that bring me pleasure. As a way to introduce myself, I wrote the following:

 

‘I love traveling the world, collecting beautiful moments and living life to the full.

 

I am also a music lover (most genres, but especially jazz, country and indie), a film enthusiast and an avid reader (crime novels being my favorite).’

 

You can read the full post here.

 

Last week I wrote about the benefits of having pleasurable activities in our daily lives. I believe this is one of the 10 key areas of our daily lives where we can do something that will improve our wellbeing, and contribute to a happier and healthier life (you can read about the other 9 key areas here and here).

 

Happiness and pleasure

 

I also wrote about the different dimensions of happiness. For instance, in her recently published book Happiness Gill Hasson consider happiness from two viewpoints: a short-lived pleasure versus a general sense of wellbeing. She discusses Aristotle’s distinction of happiness into hedonic happiness (small pleasures) and eudemonic happiness (a sense of meaning, purpose and fulfillment). Similarly, according to the ‘In the Shadow of Happiness’, a recent report published by the Nordic Council of Ministers, “in international happiness research there is considerable consensus on distinguishing between three dimensions of subjective wellbeing”. These include:

1. life evaluation (i.e. how happy or satisfied we feel with life in general),
2. affect (how happy they currently feel),
3. and eudemonia (how meaningful they perceive their life to be).

 

Today, I’d like to focus on ones of these dimensions: hedonic happiness/affect. This is the kind of happiness we largely experience as a result of pleasurable activities. What constitutes a pleasurable activity is, of course, very subjective. Each one of us can find pleasure in different things, activities or situations. I believe it is important to take some time to reflect and identify what brings pleasure to us, what makes us happy, and what we enjoy. We can then introduce such activities in our daily lives.

 

One of my ‘wellbeing’ tips is to reflect on our each day, identify and write down three positive things about that day. This list may include pleasurable activities or beautiful moments. Doing this can help us create a more positive mindset; it can also help us focus on the positive aspects of our everyday lives, rather than dwell on our shortcomings. Alternatively, we could make a similar list first thing in the morning: a list of activities we look forward to.

 

My collection of beautiful moments and pleasurable activities

 

Earlier I mentioned that I love collecting beautiful moments and living life to the full. So, I have come up with a collection of such moments and activities that bring me pleasure. These are all activities that make me happy and boost my mood, activities that give me a buzz, bring a smile to my face and make my day, activities that I enjoy.

 

Most of these activities have some inherent regularity. I have therefore grouped them into three main categories: weekly, seasonal and non-regular activities. I find that a degree of regularity and predictability can be very helpful, in that I can derive pleasure not only from the activity itself, but also from the anticipation and the leading it up to it. Alongside my regular pleasurable activities, I have the non-regular ones, which are my go-to activities when I want to feel extra comfort.

 

So, here’s my list:

 

Weekly (or even daily) beautiful moments and pleasurable activities

 

1. Walking through a park on my way to work

A typical day of mine begins at 6 or 7 am (depending on whether I start work at 8 or 9 am). My commute to work includes a short walk to the train station and two train journeys. Some days, there may also be a short bus ride. It doesn’t sound like a very pleasurable activity, does it? Yet, I can still find moments in pleasure during my commute. For example, instead of walking to the train station along the main road, I prefer taking a slightly longer route and walking through a small park. Even though I’m in a hurry to catch my first train, this small detour always brings a smile to my face. The reason? Those little squirrels crossing my path; they never fail to amuse me and show me the bright side of life. What a great way to start my day!

 

2. Listening to Release Radar on my Friday morning commute

On Fridays, I get up at 6 am. Yet, this is the day when I enjoy commuting to work the most. Being a huge music fan, I love discovering new music. The more however I expand my musical horizons, the harder it gets to keep track of all the new artists and releases. Fortunately, Spotify helps me with just that. Every Friday it automatically updates ‘Release Radar’, a personalized playlist with 30 newly released songs by my favorite artists. This is not just the soundtrack to my Friday morning commute, but the reason why I’m so looking forward to going to work every Friday, and feeling great despite waking up so early in the morning.

 

3. Leaving work on Friday afternoons

Another reason why I love Fridays (and working on Fridays) is because of those Friday afternoons/early evenings, when I leave work. Not only the end of a busy week and more than the beginning of an exciting weekend; it is also the time when the Official UK Top 40 Singles Chart is on air (on BBC Radio 1). Nowadays, it is also the only time I get to listen to mainstream pop, which I still have a soft spot for.

 

4. Ticking items off the supermarket list

When I was living at my parents’ home, I often volunteered to do the weekly grocery shopping. My mum would hand me a list and I would then go to the supermarket and start ticking items off that list. Perhaps it was the fact that I was helping out my family that –unconsciously- gave me a buzz back then. Today, however, it’s rather the association of this activity (ticking items off the list) with that feeling of pleasure I’d experienced as a teenager that never fails to replicate that very feeling. There’s a small tweak though. Inspired by a colleague of mine, I’ve recently added an extra item to the usual list: flowers. As I usually do my weekly grocery shopping on Saturdays, buying fresh flowers always adds freshness, colour and aroma to my weekend and the following week.

 

5. Chilling at home on Sunday mornings

As a child, Sunday was one of my least favorite days. Fortunately, this is not the case any longer. Sunday is usually the only day of the week when I don’t have to rush out of my flat. Instead, I can spend the whole morning indoors preparing and enjoying a healthy breakfast whilst listening to my records. I’m not sure why, but I feel that Sunday mornings are the perfect time for country music (one of my favorite genres). Come on over!

 

 

6. Having coffee and brunch by myself

Since moving to London, I have taken up the habit of going to cafes and having coffee and brunch by myself. During the working week, I tend to go for a coffee after work. During the weekends, however, I do the whole brunch shebang. To tell the truth, I used to be quite self-conscious about going anywhere on my own, until I discovered that I really enjoy this. I usually bring a book or my laptop along, so I end up spending several hours reading or writing. Needless to say that most of the other customers are doing exactly the same.

 

7. Yoga

Yoga is one of my favorite activities, as it helps me relax and exercise at the same time. I particularly enjoy yoga classes where there is some music. Quite often, I hear songs that I am not familiar with, so I try to memorise the lyrics whilst trying to balance my downward facing dogs and warriors. Once the class has finished, feeling relaxed and energised, I type these lyrics (if I still remember them) on my phone and voila… I can now add a new song to my playlist!

 

 

8. Swimming

Along with yoga, swimming is one of my favorite ways to exercise. As a child, I’d spend my summers by the sea, where I’d swim for hours and hours. In the winters, I used to swim in a swimming pool for an hour every evening. I think this combination of swimming for fun in the summer, but also to exercise and keep fit in the winter, affected the way I now view physical exercise: both as a pleasurable and a purposeful activity.

Unfortunately, with a full-time job and many other commitments, I can no longer afford to swim on a daily basis. However, I do try to swim as often as my lifestyle permits, and I always feel relaxed and rejuvenated in the end. I admit that swimming for an hour or so in a pool can be quite boring; it can become much more pleasurable by adding some music to the mix. In fact, I’ve recently bought a Waterproof Mp3 Player Earphones,Tayogo 2017 Upgraded 8GB Swimming Headset Under Water Music Player for Swimming,Surfing,Diving-White  and I now enjoy swimming more than ever before.

 

9. Baking

I only started baking a few years ago. I was actually inspired by a good friend of mine, as well as the culinary mysteries I’d been reading (yes, it is a thing and I love it; my favorites are the Hannah Swensen Series by Joanne Fluke, and the Carolyn Blue Series by Nancy Fairbanks). Yet, it is not just the activity of baking that I enjoy, but also the end product: delicious cakes, cupcakes or biscuits. Sharing, however, is the icing on the cake of baking. I’ve recently started baking on a weekly basis; I then take my bakes to my team meetings. On your marks, get set, bake!

 

10. Indulging in bubble tea and mochi ice creams

I just love these Asian sweets! I’ve recently become so obsessed with bubble tea that I bought tapioca pearls and I can now prepare it at home. I’m yet to have homemade mochi ice creams, so for the time being I indulge every time I come across them. Being quite careful about my diet, nutrition and waistline, however, I try to limit these indulgences to no more than once a week.

 

Seasonal beautiful moments and pleasurable activities

 

11. Walking in the city on a sunny autumn day

One of the things I love about England is that I can see and feel the change of the seasons (despite the fact that the temperature varies relatively little compared to other countries). I particularly like it when I take leisurely walks this time of the year (mid-autumn) and I admire the autumn colors against a backdrop of urban architecture. There is something about the fallen leaves that never fails to amaze me; perhaps because it strongly reminds me of the presence of nature in the city.

 

12. Bringing that Christmas spirit on

Christmas is probably my favorite time of the year. Or, it is rather the leading up to Christmas. Or, the whole month of December. Perhaps this has something to do with the fact that my birthday is in December, and I‘ve always had a big party to celebrate it, which means I get presents twice in the same month! Or, it may be because I used to have a two-week holiday (unfortunately, this is no longer the case). Either way, I now love everything that has to do with X-mas: decorating the Christmas tree, writing Christmas cards, listening to Christmas songs, baking and then eating anything Christmassy. I could just go on an on…

 

13. Decorating for Christmas

One of my favorite Christmastime activities is decorating the flat and the X-mas tree. I used to do this mid-December, but nowadays I may do it as early as the 1^st of the month. I guess I so love this activity for two reasons: Christmas is my favorite time of the year, and decorating is such a creative activity.

 

14. Writing Christmas cards

Another favorite Christmastime activity is buying, writing and posting X-mas cards to my family and friends. I’d put some festive music on, sit by the tree, and start… dreaming of a white Christmas with every Christmas card I write…

 

 

15. Preparing for a party

As a child and later as a medical student, I always had a big birthday party inviting my classmates and friends. As a grown-up, I usually have several parties a year; however, it is no longer practical to invite as many people as I used to (once, I had over 40 people coming over). Inviting fewer people has an added benefit: it is a perfect opportunity to bake, which feels great, as I always enjoy baking for my friends. There’s also that feeling I get on the day of the party, a few hours before my guests start arriving: excitement mixed with anticipation and apprehension, which then, as the night goes on, turns into happiness.

 

16. Returning home in those spring evenings

One of my favorite times of the year is late March, when the clocks go forward, and all of a sudden the evenings are longer. I just feel so optimistic returning home from work in those spring evenings when there’s still daylight.

 

17. Church-hopping on Good Friday and other Easter traditions

It is not just Christmas that I love. Easter, the other big religious holiday, is also one of my favorite times of the year, and I always anticipate it with pleasure. Nowadays, I no longer have a two-week holiday. Yet, I think the reason why I love Easter has to do with some of the Greek Orthodox Easter traditions (including the food) or rather my own traditions. Even though I am not religious at all, this is the only time of the year that I want to go to the church. If I happen to be in my hometown, I would go church-hopping on Good Friday; I’d always go to the same churches and also to the same café in between, and I would order exactly the same every time. Traditions, like routines, provide a sense of security, familiarity and predictability, and they can therefore be very comforting.

 

18. Watching the Eurovision Song Contest

I have to admit that the Eurovision Song Contest is one of my guilty pleasures. Every May for several weeks (before and after the contest) all I listen to is europop – quite a departure from the music I usually enjoy. When I was a kid, Eurovision was done and dusted on a Saturday night; nowadays, the contest takes place over three evenings. Needless to say, I cancel any commitments on those evenings so I can enjoy the contest from start to finish.

 

And the douze points goes to…

 

 

19. Summer nights

One of the things I associate with and I love about spending summers in the city is staying out on the balcony till late in the night. I just find it so refreshing being at home and at the same time not being indoors. This, however, comes with a number of restrictions; for example, I cannot listen to loud music or watch TV. Perhaps it is the fact that I have to let go of these restrictions so as to enjoy the summer breeze that makes the whole experience so pleasurable.

 

20. Watching films outdoors

Another thing I love about summer is that I can watch movies in open-air cinemas. Not only I find it constraining to spend those warm summer evenings watching films indoors, but I also enjoy this very experience of going to an open-air cinema. These cinemas have been an institution in Greece, popping up in the beginning of the summer when the weather gets warm. I am so happy that they have now become quite popular in London too. Last summer, I watched ‘Pretty Woman’ on the deck of a boat cruising through the city. It was such an experience seeing Julia Roberts against a backdrop of London landmarks, such as Westminster, the Houses of Parliament and the Tower Bridge.

 

 

Non-regular beautiful moments and pleasurable activities

 

21. Going to the cinema

In the winter, I’d also much rather watch a film at the cinema than at home. Perhaps this has something to do with the fact that I have associated cinema with sweet popcorn, and it is the only time I allow myself to indulge! Or, it may as well be that I cannot wait for a film to be released on DVD.

 

22. Feeling after a film

One of the great things about films is that they can stir emotions and evoke strong feelings. Have you ever watched a film and felt euphoric afterwards? I certainly have. It doesn’t happen very often, but when it does, it feels so great, doesn’t it? I usually get that feeling when I least expect it; sometimes it is not strictly due to the film, but due to the circumstances. One of the most memorable cinematic experiences I’ve had was when I watched Lars Von Trier’s masterpiece ‘Dogville’. It felt so cathartic, that I still use this film as a point of reference.

 

23. Taking a different route

As much as I love routine, I also enjoy discovering new things and places. I particularly enjoy getting purposely lost in the city; instead of taking a familiar route, I choose a different one (whether I’m on foot or drive). This way I get to know a different side of the city, and discover new places to visit and further explore.

 

24. Buying books

I wouldn’t probably call myself a ‘shopaholic’ and I have rarely indulged in shopping sprees. Going to the shops is more of a necessity than a pleasure. For this reason, browsing is way down on my list of pleasurable activities. Yet, going to a record store or a bookshop is a notable exception. I particularly enjoy going to bookshops just to browse new titles and kill some time. I always end up buying several books and this feels so good!

 

25. Listening to music from my teens

As a teenager, I was so into mainstream pop and R’n’B. Britney Spears, Backstreet Boys and Destiny’s Child were among my favorite artists back then. Nowadays, every time I listen to those songs, I still get that feeling of pleasure I experienced then. So, even though my music taste has changed, I would still occasionally put some of that early 00s music on, dance and sing along to every word. Baby, one more time…

 

 

26. Watching country music video clips

For some rather inexplicable reason, I’ve always loved country music. I’ve also enjoyed watching video clips since my teenage years. Unfortunately, country music has never been popular in Europe, so country video clips are rarely on TV. I am ever so grateful to YouTube for making them accessible to me no matter where in the world I am. Even though I do enjoy keeping up-to-date with the charts and the new releases, I have a ‘list’ of my favorites that I often go back to. ‘Breathe’ is on top of that list. Not only it’s one of my favorite songs of all time, but it’s also a great video to watch.

 

 

27. Watching cat videos

I’ve always found cats and kittens very cute. Unfortunately, my current living arrangements are such that I cannot have a cat at home. So, what’s the next best thing? YouTube! I am particularly fond of a Japanese cat called Maru. Not only he is incredibly handsome and cute, he is also so obsessed with boxes that he manages to fit even in the smallest ones imaginable. Such a pleasure to watch!

 

 

Activities that brought me pleasure when younger

 

When I was a kid, this list would’ve looked quite different. Growing up, I have matured and changed; the items on my list have also changed. Yet, I feel compelled to discuss three activities that consistently brought pleasure to my daily life back then:

 

28. Obsessing with music charts

As a teenager I was obsessed with music charts. My whole week was actually structured around them: Monday was the day I’d watch a TV show with video clips from the American music charts; Tuesday was the day for the UK charts. Then, on Thursday afternoon, the US charts would be published online, and I would religiously check them. Saturday morning and afternoon, I’d follow the local radio and TV station countdowns respectively. Sunday morning, I would buy the paper to check the Greek music charts, whereas in the evening, I’d check the UK singles and album charts on the net. Nowadays, I am still as obsessed with music (I guess it’s pretty obvious from my list), but charts pay a somewhat less important role in my life.

 

29. Reading car magazines

Another pleasurable activity embedded in my weekly routine was going to the newsagent’s every Tuesday to buy the only car magazine published weekly. I am no longer as interested in cars, but throughout school I so loved reading about the new car models, that Tuesday was one of my favorite days.

 

30. Moving to my nan’s on Friday evenings

However, my favorite day of the week was Friday. Every Friday evening, once I came back home school, I would pack my bags and move to my grandmother’s for the weekend. We would then order pizza and watch TV sitcoms till late in the night. As an adult, I stopped spending my weekends at my nan’s. I have also started to pay more attention to my diet, so I no longer indulge in this activity. Yet, I never fail to enjoy a pizza when I order one!

 

Reflections

 

This is a list of moments and activities, rather than ‘things’ or situations. The reason for this is that the pleasure we derive from engaging into pleasurable activities can linger on well after these activities have finished. The pleasure derived from activities is not experienced only as long as the activity lasts, but can stay with us for longer. But how about the pleasure derived from beautiful moments? Can this linger too, or is it momentary? I believe it can last well beyond that moment. Also, these beautiful moments occur in the context of activities. For these reasons, I have not really distinguished between moments and activities.

 

Also, these are all activities that do not require a substantial amount of time and money (as opposed to traveling, location- or weather-dependent sports such as skiing or diving etc); they can therefore be easily incorporated into my daily life. Sadly, as much as I love traveling, this is not part of my daily life, and this is why it has not made it to the list.

 

Reflecting on the specific items on my list, I’ve noticed that most of these activities are not what I’d consider ‘purposeful’ (as opposed to activities like work, education, family responsibilities, or activities of daily living). Most of them do not fit in with my definition of a ‘hobby’ either. Of course, as their name suggests, they serve the purpose of making me experience pleasure, and this is not something to dismiss.

 

Final thoughts

 

Last but not least, I have purposely included activities that I can do on my own, without having to rely on other people or circumstances beyond my control. I think this is very important, since it reinforces the fact that we are ultimately the ones responsible for our happiness, and in control of our wellbeing. Of course, there are activities and situations that I find pleasurable and largely depend on other people or variables beyond my control; these are not to dismiss. Yet, when trying to identify the activities that make you happy, I would strongly encourage you to think of those that you can do by yourself; then go ahead and do them!

 

Alex

 

(the Traveling Psychiatrist)

 

Further reading

 

If you enjoy lists as much as I do, I would highly recommend Neil Pasricha’s inspiring blog ‘1000 Awesome Things’, where he posts one awesome thing a day.