The 7 Secrets of Happiness: An Optimist’s Journey

What an awesome title for a book! Happiness, optimism, and a journey, all in the same sentence. In the introduction, Gyles Brandreth writes about his personal journey looking for happiness, a journey that took him to different places around the world where he met some very remarkable people: the Pope’s exorcist at the Vatican, Buddhist monks in Cambodia, Archbishop Desmond Tutu in South Africa, Quentin Crisp in New York, and the Queen of Denmark in Copenhagen. But it was in Dublin where he discovered the 7 secrets of happiness thanks to the late Dr Anthony Clare, Professor of Psychiatry at Trinity College, widely known for his radio interviews: In the Psychiatrist’s Chair. In fact, Brandreth says, he and Clare were planning to write together a book about happiness, but Clare sadly died.

As a Psychiatrist myself, I was intrigued; I simply had to read Brandreth’s book and find out his 7 secrets of happiness. I read it amidst the coronavirus crisis, and I would strongly recommend it.

The 7 Secrets of Happiness: An Optimist’s Journey

First, Brandreth explores what makes people happy. Laughter, friends, music, dancing, sex, sunshine, children, family, drinks and food (chocolate in particular) appear to be common ingredients in most people’s recipes for happiness. He then briefly discusses the history of happiness before going on to explore what happiness is. Here he takes note of the writings of the Austrian Sigmund Freud, the father of psychoanalysis, and Carl Jung, the famous Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst. He also refers to the Scotsman Samuel Smiles, the father of self-help books, as well as to the contemporary psychotherapist Brett Kahr. Inspired by Freud’s teaching, Kahr has come up with his own 7 secrets of happiness:

1. Talk
2. Make friends
3. Keep a diary
4. Listen
5. Cultivate intimacy
6. Be more playful
7. Get in touch with your feelings

In the second half of the book, Brandreth focuses on his relationship with Clare. He writes that when he first met the famous psychiatrist, he asked him the elixir of happiness, the 7 secrets of happiness. He then reflects on their discussions, which subsequently led him to come up with the answer to his initial question. So, here are Brandreth’s 7 secrets of happiness:

1. Cultivate a passion
2. Be a leaf on a tree (be part of something bigger than yourself)
3. Break the mirror (simply put don’t be a narcissist)
4. Don’t resist change
5. Audit your happiness
6. Live in the moment
7. Be happy (even if you don’t feel it, put on a happy face)

My own recipe and secrets of happiness

Reflecting on both Brandreth’s and Kahr’s lists of ingredients for happiness, I realize that they are very much in keeping with my own recommendations (my 10 tips) for mental health and wellbeing, which are supported by my clinical experience, my research, and by having critically read a large number of books about happiness and wellbeing. For example, Brandreth suggests living in the moment; this reminds of my own recommendation to incorporate mindfulness into our everyday lives (tip no 6). Cultivating a passion is not very different from finding pleasurable activities, a key ingredient in my own recipe (tip no 10). Kahr suggests getting in touch with your feelings, which echoes my own belief about the usefulness of psychotherapy or reading self-help books (tip no 4). Keeping a diary can also be helpful, especially if this is a gratitude journal (tip no 7).

I have previously written about the concept of the ‘aggregation of marginal gains’. Dave Brailsford, the cycling coach and manager of Team Sky, explains the marginal gains as ‘the 1 percent margin for improvement in everything you do’. The doctrine of marginal gains is all about small incremental improvements in any process adding up to a significant improvement when they are all added together. Brailsford believed that if you improved every area related to cycling by just 1 percent, then those small gains would add up to remarkable improvement.

I strongly believe that we can use the same approach in key areas of our daily life, to maximize our wellbeing and contribute to a happier and healthier life.

And since I’ve been talking about secrets of happiness, here are a few more books worth reading:

Happy: Secrets to Happiness from the Cultures of the World

In the introduction to this book, I read that ‘it’s some of the most basic aspects of life found in every culture that bring us the most joy – connection, mindfulness, gratitude, play’. As a Psychiatrist, I’ve learned how important these aspects are for our wellbeing. However, despite being a travel enthusiast, I had not previously considered these very important aspects in the context of traveling. Reading this book, I put two and two together and realized that traveling and the subsequent contact with different cultures can teach us so much about wellbeing, and help us live happier lives.

The book discusses 55 cultural experiences from 43 countries of the world. By ‘cultural’ I mean that these experiences are embedded in the cultures and traditions of these countries. These are experiences that can teach us a lot about happiness, and by distilling their core messages and secrets, we can introduce an extra layer of happiness to our everyday lives (without necessarily having to travel to those far-away places).

Ikigai: The Japanese secret to a long and happy life

In this book, the authors Hector Garcia and Francesc Miralles discuss the Japanese concept ikigai and then take the reader through other related concepts and values, including ichigo ichie and flow, as well as resilience and mindfulness. They also discuss wabi-sabi, another Japanese concept about accepting the fleeting and imperfect nature of the world and life.

However, the main difference between this book and most books about ikigai (or happiness even) lies in the emphasis that Garcia and Miralles place on longevity. They pay particular attention to Okinawa; this Japanese island is often claimed to be the place where people live longer than anywhere else on planet Earth. As the title suggests, they try to uncover the Okinawans’ secret to longevity, whilst exploring the concept of ikigai.

Further reading

If you’d like to read more (about) books about happiness, check out my upcoming post due to be published on the 20th of March 2020 (the International Day of Happiness).

You can also read my posts ‘9 Secrets to Happiness from the Cultures of the World‘ and ‘Ikigai & Komorebi: Finding purpose & beautiful moments‘.

Alex

(the Traveling Psychiatrist)

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